We Need to Rethink How We Define Success and Happiness

Growing up in the U.S., the definition of success was often hard-wired into materialism. In this culture, "more" is synonymous with "better." It is a cycle of the newer car, the designer bag, the latest iPhone. It’s ingrained in the advertisements we consume and the way we are raised: we are taught to be attracted to the bigger, faster, and shinier. We might dismiss this as a "first-world problem" or the byproduct of having the surplus money and time to go out and buy things. But the cost is deeper than the price tag.

In the West, we often ask how much someone has. But after backpacking across different continents and cultures, I’ve realized that while we are busy accumulating, the rest of the world is asking a different question: How can we share our time?

The Global Blueprint

There is a common misconception that people in developing nations focus on community only because they lack the money or time for materialism. I argue the opposite: They have it right. Their priorities haven't shifted because of a lack of funds; they have shifted because they value something more profound.

• Nepal: Faith as Purpose. In the high Himalayas, happiness isn't about speed or convenience; it’s tied to a life of simplicity and a deep sense of purpose. This is inseparable from the religious landscape—the prayer flags, the monasteries, and a spiritual resilience that makes the grueling climb feel like an offering rather than a chore. There is a clarity there that we often trade away for the "noise" of modern life.

• Spain: The Art of the Pause. Walking the Camino de Santiago taught me that rest is not "lost time." The slower pace of life and the siesta are ways of living life fully. In Spain, the pause is just as important as the work. It’s a culture that respects the human need to stop, breathe, and simply exist.

• Mexico: The Joy of the Collective. Success here is found in the music, the sports, and the sheer fun of being together. Whether it’s eating as a family or a stadium full of people watching soccer, happiness is a shared, loud, and vibrant energy. It isn’t something you buy; it’s something you join.

• Fiji & Tonga: Connection. Success was measured in the strength of the community, where entire evenings were shared over kava and storytelling.

• The Balkans & Morocco: Here, success was hospitality. It was about the pride of a potluck, a shared bottle of wine, and the value of a deep, hours-long conversation with a stranger.

• Peru & Bolivia: I saw how Indigenous traditions and spirituality blend into everyday routines. Respecting the land and your ancestry isn't a chore; it’s a form of respecting yourself and your community.

The 33L Philosophy

Nothing hammers this home like a long-distance trek or long backpacking trip. Walking 800km on the Camino or 22 days through Nepal forces a realization that is more emotional than physical: You don't need a lot to be happy.

When you are out there, you realize that every extra object—every "just in case" gram—is actually a weight on your mind as much as your back. I remember the literal sense of relief when I finally donated an extra cooking pot or a spare layer. It wasn't about being a minimalist; it was about realizing that my happiness wasn't tied to those things.

You shift from a mindset of "What if I need this?" to "I have exactly what I need, and if something comes up, I'll figure it out." Now, whether I am gone for two weeks or nine months, everything I need fits into a 33L backpack. A few shirts, two pairs of shorts, along pants, Birkenstocks, and trail runners.

The Re-entry Shock

The true test of this philosophy happened when I returned to the U.S. straight from a trip through South America. Walking through Boston, I saw an advertisement that read: Stressed out ? Shop ! Retail Therapy.

I stopped and read it three times, laughing at the absurdity. Yet, the "cultural gravity" of the West is incredibly strong. Within two weeks of being back, I found myself browsing for a new rain jacket simply because mine felt "too old."

It is hard to blame anyone for falling into this trap when it is so deeply engineered into our environment. But we need a reset. We need to stop defining success solely by what we can extract or accumulate, and start defining it by the depth of our connections and the strength of the communities we build.